For Texas spouses preparing to bring their marriage to a close, issues of identity are often overlooked. Divorce requires so many decisions and details to consider, and addressing the less tangible matters can often fall to the bottom of one’s priority list. When it comes to matters of identity, failure to plan can lead to negative emotional and practical consequences.
All spouses incorporate their role as “husband” or “wife” into their identity after they marry. The manner in which those roles are approached may differ, but being part of a married unit has implications. When the marriage ends, the parties are no longer “husbands” or “wives,” and adjusting to that reality can be more difficult than anticipated.
For example, many spouses allow their partner to manage their social calendar. They participate in social events and interactions with others, but they are not the captain of that ship. Once a divorce occurs, it can be hard to take on the role of social director in one’s own life. Far too many people simply let social connections fade after a divorce, which can take an emotional toll.
The same can be said about parenting connections with teachers and the parents of a child’s friends. Spouses who didn’t take on the bulk of responsibility for those connections during the marriage risk falling out of the loop after a divorce, and losing that important connection with their kids. That outcome can be negative for both parents and children.
All of these issues can be addressed during and shortly after a Texas divorce. Doing so, however, requires thinking about identity and how it will change after the marriage ends. With the right degree of motivation and effort, it’s possible to build a new identity that supports one’s current and future needs.